"Tell Me Pastor" cautious on Down Low complaint ...

As we continue to track some of the disucssions relating to same gender loving issues today's Star has another letter that seems edited to reflect a stance on a down low husband who after getting married did not want sexual contact with his wife. "He never displayed any signs of homosexuality" was quoted in the letter suggesting profiling of sorts as if same gender loving men are to exude some trait that makes them gay or this letter writer is naive as they come or are we the readers being taken for a ride? as I have concluded in some instances that these letters seem will fabricated at best or edited to create a spin.

Certainly many possibilities lie here but as before we have seen his biphobic stance as well so if the man was indeed bisexual we may never know as he would have probably not tolerated a letter of that type of a man attracted to both sexes and marrying one of the genders, for a psychologist I am amazed at his stance on homosexuality in general however and how quickly he calls on biblical references to abominations to substantiate his arguments while stressing that it is a sin and is wrong when he must have been tutored in recognising the orientation issues and that of sexual identity. That swapping of ideology where convenient is disturbing to me and to many of you my readers who have expressed such in previous rants on the man and his positions taken in letters.

Have a read of the latest piece and see the short but cautious response from Psychologist/Pastor Aaron Dumas.

Deceived by my gay husband

LETTER

Dear Pastor,

I am writing you to express the shame and hurt that I am feeling right now. I met this man a few years ago in Jamaica and fell in love with him. We both shared mutual feelings at that time and we decided to get married. We had a very small wedding in front of a few family members. He was very loving and attentive towards me before getting married, but once we said "I do", everything went downhill after that.



Immediately after we got married he seemed to be displaying some awkward behaviour for a newly-wed. He wouldn't wear his ring and would shy away when I would attempt to have intercourse. I found his behaviour to be odd, but I thought he just had a bad experience with a girl from his past. I attempted to question him, but he would get aggressive and angry towards me. His behaviour started to get more and more bizarre to the point where we were arguing constantly. Even through the arguments I still stood beside him and did my job as his wife. He was very abusive emotionally towards me.



About one year later, I ended up finding out that he is a homosexual and desired not to be with me. He never displayed any signs of homosexuality. He was on the 'down low'. I was very hurt and saddened by my findings. I am still having a hard time dealing with the fact of how I dedicated my time, energy and money on this man and he deceitfully used me. I am also very much embarrassed as I never thought in a million years this would have happened to me.



I am trying to deal with this emotionally even up to this day. How can I get through this pain? Please help me.



Deceived By Husband

RESPONSE

Dear Deceived,



You have not stated whether you are still living with this man. If you are still living together, you need to get out because by continuing to live with him you are subjecting yourself to more abuse and humiliation.



Second, you need to find a psychologist and have sessions so as to learn how to deal with the past, present and future. It is indeed unfortunate that you made the wrong choice, but please forgive yourself for the mistake you have made. Be assured of my prayers and please let me hear from you again.



Pastor

ENDS

Two cents continued:

Will this argument between the LGBT lobby and the sections of the evangelical community ever end anytime soon as recent publications and responses to the ad campaign though heavily critiqued by myself and others and a barely luke warm response from the community itself ever end? Check out this article from the Jamaica Observer on the pastoral responses to the video JFLAG launched,

Gay TV advert angers clerics

Some quotes include:

".................associate pastor of the Tower Hill Missionary Church in Kingston, Mark Dawes, suggested that the church needed to be more vocal in denouncing the homosexual lifestyle.



“I am prepared to be loving and compassionate to all persons, irrespective of their class or creed or persuasion, but that love and compassion to all and sundry will not stop me from speaking the truth in love as I see the truth,” said Dawes, a former journalist.



“As innocuous and as innocent as that public service announcement might appear, it is part of a wider plan by militant homosexuals to gradually desensitise Jamaicans to homosexuality, so that homosexual behaviour and practice can become mainstream in Jamaica,” asserted the pastor.



Rev Monsignor Kenneth Richards, rector at Holy Trinity Cathedral in Kingston, was just as sceptical of the message of the PSA, pointing out that the Catholic church did not embrace homosexual unions since they were not in keeping with religious principles.



“I don’t think we should tolerate it, we should object to it. I don’t think it should be broadcast,” said the priest when asked his views on the PSA."



Peace and tolerance



H